When She Came
Still keeping a hold on him...that's me. I still remember the day he would tell me that I should do well in my studies... the way he slips “goodluck” notes with a big smiley face under my armchair... those times when we would walk the rooms from the library and talk all the while. And oh, how could I forget our kiss. How I wish t'was longer. How I hope we could still be together. How I dream of moments with you, just hanging out, eat and shout at the shore like what we did before. But time did outdate us. You are now hers. You can never be mine.
You are just but a dream. My fantasy, wish, my hope, a prayer. I thought we were going good together. I thought you would never leave me. Sometimes things change and so do you.
They said you were perfect for each other. I really can't deny it Her fair skin glowed as the light radiates her. She was beautiful in every angle I look. I can't help but admire a woman like her. You two were just so admiring to look at.
Things may change, but not my love for you. It's what I've only got now. I continued loving you because I can't stand not being with you.
But there are also things I regret. Things I want to undo or delete. I do regret that day, I swear. I wish I have thought of other options. I wish I never did. I wish I deeply thought of how it was gonna be without you, my family and her by my side, caring and understanding me. Never did I anticipated this. That... that I was going to be empty. To be left out and cheated by my own feelings. But the thought of you- leaving-me was so absurd. You showed me how you cared for me but you never did plan a future with me. How come we're not part of your stupid plans? How could you be such a coward? Afraid? Scared? How could you turn us down and left us? Why were you selfish, inconsiderate and so insensitive?
I was there. Begging for you to come back and make our family because Nicole came to our lives. But you ran away. Saying you don't deserve an early responsibility and burden to your life, escaping the fruit of our secret. You were 21, I was 16 then. You said you had set your goals ahead of you. You had better plans... and we we're not a part of it.
I was clouded by my hurt, blinded by your rejection, I ran. After all of what I did, there is one more option to pick. A choice I have made. A solution to my own predicament. A sweet agony. You can't blame me, I just want to be cold, to be numb, to feel nothing. In that way, I may not feel the excruciating pain flowing and surging in my blood.
Despite all of what happened, I am still here. Guarding you, protecting, caring, loving in every possible way I could even lifeless as I am.
“SISTER, FOUND”
Recess was just over. I was in the middle of Slumberland because our class had been cancelled. Then suddenly, I felt the heavy hands of Rosie, my classmate, waking me. She told me my sister wanted to see me. Knowing her, I doubted that she had good intentions but still I came along and went outside. Feeling the cool wind on my face, I braced myself for a heated conversation and bloody encounter because she would only humilate me in front of people. This time Ate was playing her role so good. She was in tears when I saw her. My heart was frozen for a second. My thoughts of her fooling me were dismissed. She immediately hugged me. Hugged me tight. It was very unusual. Unfamiliar. Awkward. That was the very first “sister” hug she gave me. I was a 2nd year high school student but I couldn't remember anything before that showed she cared for me. She used to put me in shame. She used to tell everyone that I was so stupid. I waited for any prankster dialogue. But none came out from her mouth. She only hugged me while she continued crying. We were at the back of the door, I was still in shock when she stopped hugging me. She told me how much our parents had sacrificed just to satisfy her needs and wants. She told me that she had been a fool. How she regretted what she has been. She added that I must not be like her, that I should work harder and take my studies seriously. I was amazed by what was happening. She said sorry for all her wrongdoings towards me. I really didn't know what exactly happened in the faculty room earlier with the teachers and my parents with her. But something told me it was somewhat good... she changed. It was the first hug I received from her. That day, I found a sister. All my hatred for living under her shadow were pulled out and thrown away.
A REVIEW OF DEPARTURES
Movie Review:
The movie was touching yet it was also very humorous and funny at times. Kobayashi ended up desperately hunting for a job after his dreams were crushed. Upon his profession, witnessing many casketing and burial ceremonies, he realized how noble his job is. That a mortician is not just a high-paying job but a job that needs passion, respect for and understanding of human life. He did not only respect the “departed ones” but he now understands how significant his profession and started gaining his self-esteem even though his love left him. He started believing in himself. I liked it because it tells us that we don't need to be accepted by people around us. As long as you know you have not hurt them.
My favorite part was the ending. He hated his father. He even forgets his face. He was blinded by the hurt that he has been feeling. He had not entertained even a possibility that his father might love him and even if he would, Kobayashhi would hate him. And when his father died, the undertakers did their job without care that's why he was disappointed. He had made the casketing himself and there, he discovered that his father had always thought of him and that he was loved by his father. He finally reconciled and accepted the truth. He respected and eventually loved his father again. He may be dead but what was important is that his hidden feeling and hatred was resolved.
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